11.01.2009

I grew today.

It's almost scary how much someone can impact your life without you even being aware of it. Someone who you seemingly weren't even very close to... My co-worker passed away today, and I am completely broken.
I firmly believe - know - that life does not end at death... I believe that one lives forever in many different forms, and that every single soul chooses its departure. In other words, he had accomplished what he came to accomplish, and his spirit was ready to evolve.
That being said, I know that Death should be treated as a celebration of sorts - and I'm really not so much broken up over his decision to move on...
I'm just...ashamed of myself for not soaking in the moments I had with him to get to know him better. From the moment we started working together I always had this feeling that I needed to get to know him better, to talk with him and open up with him... but I never did because "there was always next time."
I'm going to say this - if you don't remember anything I've ever said, if you're simply skimming my words, then please remember this:
It's things such as this that truly teach me that the most powerful advice one will ever hear is to "Treasure each person as if it is the last time you will speak to them."
I was working with him yesterday. It was busy, and I hardly spoke to him... We joked around a little bit but I can not imagine how differently I would have spent yesterday had I known what was going to happen.
I would like to say this - this man was the prime example of how someone should appreciate their moments. Never did I hear him complain about working too much, never did I see him angry, never did I watch him pass up a moment to make someone laugh...
So, please, please, please...listen to my words and start making the extra effort to make someone you know smile, or help someone with a problem, to open up to someone; anyone, to embrace someone - even if you're running late... And when your heart tells you that you need to appreciate these moments with that one person in your class, at work, or even at home - by God, listen to it.
I know that these words will seem somewhat hollow until, or unless, you've experienced it yourself... but please, there are cliches for a reason. If only I had followed my own advice, rather than simply giving it. If only, if only.

I miss you. Very much.

I am Lion; Watch me Sleep.